How to Survive Preschool

My version of our enrichment assignment (sarcastic survival guide) today–with prepositional phrases bolded. Practice recognizing those prepositional phrases and asking yourself: what is it *doing* in the sentence?

1. Bite everyone. Don’t limit yourself to the fish-shaped cheese crackers at snack time, chomp down on your friend’s ear, snag a tooth on Teacher. That’s what teeth are for! Bite! Bite!

2. Rage against nap-time. You know the most exciting things happen when you’re asleep! Why miss them? Experience everything life has to offer, fully awake. Scream, cry, paste yourself to an alert friend, but refuse to nap. There is fun to be had.

3. Run a macaroni flicking competition. Why glue pasta to construction paper when you can flick it across the room? This is even more fun if you dip the pasta in glue and glitter before you flick it. See if you can aim your macaroni missile at the ceiling, so it will stick there and decorate your preschool classroom for years!

4. Cry as often as you can. If someone steals your stacking block, express your emotions! If someone looks at you crossly, snarl back. Then, cry. Scream and squeal like you’re winning a championship game. Life is yours to embrace! Embrace it with tears flowing.

5. Cling to adults’ legs. This free ride can get you easily from one side of the playground to another. Why walk when you can cruise on a nice pantleg? This also works during playtime. Want to get from the listening center to the drama center? Catch a ride. Adults applaud when you do this, so be ready for a lot of cheering and hugs!

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